Man Charged for Making Coffee Naked in His Own Home

http://www.myfoxdc.com/dpp/news/local/101909_man_caught_making_coffee_naked_faces_charges

This makes me so angry. A man who was home alone made coffee in his kitchen at 5:30 am, naked. A woman who was walking with a 7 year-old kid (trespassing on his front lawn too incidentally) saw him through the window and called the cops. The cops arrested him, and now if convicted he faces up to a year in jail and a $2000 fine.

I don’t think I have to enumerate the many retarded elements of this story. I hope this guy sues the woman who instigated this.

CERN sabotaged by John Connor

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/science/biology_evolution/article6879293.ece

A new theory put forth by respected scientists (respected up until now anyways) posits that the Higgs boson may be ‘abhorrent to nature,’ and time distortion waves are rippling back from the point in time when the particle is finally created to stop the process that eventually creates it. Or in a nutshell, God hates it.

I find this simultaneously hilarious and awesome. If it’s true, it throws a little wonder back into reality, because science this freakin’ weird is indistinguishable from magic. :K)

John Hammond pointed out that when the first Disney theme park opened, nothing worked. Ian Malcom retorted that, ‘Yes John, but when the Pirates of the Caribbean break down, the pirates don’t collapse into a black hole and destroy the solar system.’

Crystalline data storage

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/scotland/edinburgh_and_east/8312286.stm

Yay! I can’t wait to buy my first pack of Crystal-RWs! They’ll be so pretty…and they’ll sit in this little docking station, while laser light flashes through them, creating a tiny cubical disco. And as it fills up, different colors will show you how much of your cube is still available for writing! AND THEN IT GETS TOO HOT IN YOUR ROOM AND YOUR DATA MELTS!

Well, I’d hope not.

Wedding

So my brother got married about 10 hours ago. It was a very simple ceremony with no bridesmaids or groomsmen standing up front, performing any duties. Afterwards was a nice low-budget reception, wherein I did some awful dancing.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Py5qAH7wELY is a more extreme case, but I did nothing tonight to redeem the white man in the arena of dance. I did The Lawnmower. For demo purposes only, The Cabbage Patch. And the Roxbury-head-bob, but only for the appropriate song. I think I bruised my brain.

RL Update

Mom was discharged from the hospital today, though they sent her home with a lovely gift basket of junk she’ll be pouring into her veins for the next two weeks.

Well, maybe we can disguise the IV pole as a roving flower arrangement for the wedding on Friday.

Playing Fallout 3, now on the PC instead of the long-departed 360. I FINALLY found the %*%@ing sheet music for Agatha. Those Bethesda people are sneaky bastards. Step One: Never reward the player for opening bathroom stall doors. Step Two: Hide a single elusive quest item behind a toilet.

After running through the game normally, I plan to cheat like Bill Clinton on ecstasy and meth, and experiment with mods. I wouldn’t say no to replacing the Mysterious Stranger with Stephen Colbert, armed with an American flagstaff. Would you?